I’ve been thinking about how to spend my remaining department store vouchers and birthday money, and my stomach groans every time. Shopping trip anxiety is real. Even the online shop drives me crazy – figuring out the right size ( hopefully ), the pain of returning if it’s wrong, that ghastly shipping cost. Not to mention the sheer amount of choice and consequent decision fatigue.
To be honest, I couldn’t even tell you the last time I purchased an item of clothing with my own real, hard-earned money. I’ve been living off vouchers, gifts, and secondhand steals. My wardrobe gathering has accidentally been extremely ethically fashion aware for years now, before I even knew it was a thing or took the time the care. As soon as the parent’s credit card and seasonal shopping trips were snatched away I became a non-purchasing, re-using kween.
Although frustrating at times, particularly with the incredible difficulty it takes to even come close to resembling current trends without new purchases, I think it’s done a lot for my creativity in the last few years. That and my abhorrence of my own outfit repeating ( because I can’t handle mundane – but I don’t judge that in others ). It’s like I’ve been left alone on a deserted island, with nothing. All I’ve got to play with are the different flora around me, and the occasional flotsam discarded by passing boats ( i.e. other people’s wardrobes ).
One day soon I will take the plunge. I will walk into a store, or let my fingers do the shopping online, and spend these things. Buy those items I’ve been whinging about not having and just suck it up with the sizing issue. Help me to be brave. Then I can start buying all of these pretty things.